What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

Yes sir it is.

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

Why do girls not like some guys at the university?

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

Is something wrong with my discharge? So, when I masturbate, white discharge comes from my vagina, but it's not stretchy, it's pasty. It doesn't smell and I'm not itchy, so I'm sure it's not a yeast infection. Why is it pasty though?

Sure no problem officer.

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

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ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

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Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

HELLO

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

Are judges being lenient on hard criminals?

{RING} {RING}

After a few moments he returns.

What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

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